Positive Parenting With Olu

PARENTS AND TEACHERS GETTING ON THE SAME TEAM.

In this day and age, everybody is stressed and nobody has got the time. Parents are working harder than ever, and teachers have larger classrooms and more responsibilities. Believe me, if everybody had time and more resources, there would be a lot less friction between parents and schools. But that’s not the case, so we just have to live with that and figure out how to manage it the best way we can. After all, we have the common goal of wanting our children to behave responsibly and get an education. Schools have a legitimate interest in kids getting an education and learning how to become independent.

Parent and teachers should be on the same team, but sadly, often they’re not. There was a time when teachers and parents worked together – where if a teacher called a parent, the parent really worked on changing their child’s behavior. Kids were held accountably at home. It’s not often that way anymore. Now parents are often blaming the teachers and the kids play both ends against the middle. Kids can be highly manipulative in this area. I think parents, and teachers should work hard at being on the same team. I think the parent’s role is “How can we help and work together to get this child on track”.

I’ve heard a lot of stories about bad teachers. I believe most teachers are trying their best. The truth is, you have to really try to work with the teacher your child gets. If there is an issue, I recommend you go to that teacher and talk about it. And if that doesn’t work, then go to the administrator and try to set up some meetings. Just realize that the more arduous the relationship between the parents and the school are, the more your child is going to suffer – and the more they are going to get away with. Don’t forget, when parents and teachers fight, nobody wins. And at the end result, is that your child doesn’t feel he has to change his behavior at all. If your child has been labelled a trouble maker and he/she has chronic behavior or attitude problems, its crucial that you are able to communicate with his teacher and the school. I think if you can develop a working relationship around a child who has these problems, it becomes a lot easier to support that teacher in his or her efforts.

Communication and compromise are a huge part of parenting and working with your child’s school.

Please let me know what you think, and thanks for your time, until next time. Bye for now.

CONSEQUENCES; Should I Give Them To My Child When He Gets In Trouble At School

To be honest, every parent whose child acts out in class get sick of hearing from the school, even if they know their child is legitimately a problem. Parents don’t want to go to work and hear about their kids during the school day: They want the school to handle it. And the school thinks parents should be more involved in dealing with appropriate behavior. So when should parents get involved? I think the answer to that is straight forward. In my opinion, it depends on whether the problem is “functional” or “relational” A functional problem includes being late for class, running around the school. I personally do not think parents should give more consequences at home for those types of things.

But the whole game changes when it comes to relational problems. These are problems that have to do with inappropriate behavior towards people or property. If your child steals, if he is physically abusive, if he is threatening, if he gets into fight, parents need to hold him accountable and give consequences at home in addition to the consequences the school assign.

Again, one of the thing parents have to avoid is insulating their child from the natural consequences of their behavior. If your child destroys property or assaults someone at school and you do everything you can to protect him so he doesn’t have to face legal consequences, I think you’re making a mistake. I think you can support your child through those consequences. I would. But the more you insulate him from the natural consequences of his actions, the less likely those actions are going to change. Because let’s face it, people don’t change until there’s pressure to change.

And unfortunately, that pressure often comes from negative consequences, whether thats’s for a speeding ticket or for being physically aggressive in school. We understand that fact as adults in society: people get tickets all the time for running lights and for speeding. You may not like getting a ticket, you may not think its fair. But the bottom line is that it makes you look at your behavior and change it. When a child gets in serious trouble at school, many parents become worried that it will go on their permanent record. Is that a legitimate worry for a parent? Yes, but you don’t soothe those worries by sweeping the problem under the rug.

Let me be clear; if your child assaults someone at school and doesn’t get a record now – that’s all there is to it.

Thanks for your time, this post is a continuation of the above topic, please check out my previous post on the same topic, if you want to read more.

See you soon……

Hello guys, I hope you are all well! I would like to suggest that you should check my last post on; WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOUR CHILD IS ACTING OUT IN CLASS! for you, to get the more insight of what I’m about to talk about today. I won’t bore you and just get right into the details of this post.

THE NEW SCHOOL YEAR: STARTING OFF ON THE RIGHT FOOT!

If your child is in danger of having the troublemaker label follow him/her from year to year, you are probably wondering how to start him off on the right foot this year.

You should coach your child about the importance of first impressions at the beginning of any school year. Let him/her know how important the first couple of the weeks of school are in terms of getting along in class and doing well. Tell him that presenting himself as respectful and responsible will make a big difference for him. You can say, “Remember how we talked about what you would do differently in school this year to get along better?, well, one of the things we mentioned was that, you should be polite to your teachers and not talk back when you have the urge to talk back or rude, what could you do differently?”.

Sometimes my son tells me that he doesn’t think his teacher likes him and he doesn’t think he can get along with that teacher, I would often say to him, “Look, it’s your job to get along with your teacher, not your teachers job to get along with you”. So, when he complains about his teachers again, I would say, “Whether you work in a retail store or an office, your boss and co -workers won’t put up with that kind of behavior. you have to learn how to get along with people, that’s part of becoming independent”.

SOME OF THE MOST IMPORTANT CRITERIA FOR INDEPENDENCE ARE:

• How well does this person manage adversity?

• How well does he get along with people he doesn’t like?

• How does he deal with supervisors who are a pain in the neck?

We are all going to have that in life. So, the idea is to give your child the skills to get along no matter who he or she is dealing with.

Thanks for your time, until next time. Bye for now and stay blessed.

Hey there, today I will be talking about the Type 3 child; The Determined Child also known as a Strong Willed Child.

You will know when you have a determined child on your hands because The Type 3 child is the most noticeable.

The determined child is naturally more physical, active and stubborn.

He or she was born with a drive to get things done, usually in their own specific way.

They are usually told to “calm down” or “stop being so demanding”.

The Determined Child Mantra is; Let’s Get Results!

• They have a strong will.

• They will pursue several big goals at once.

• Determined types are naturally active and adventurous – They are ready to go, do, and explore!

• They want to try leadership positions in school, home , or work.

• They are self motivated rather than motivated by others.

• Can be loud, forceful, or straight to the point – Also seen as bluntly honest.

THE BEST WAY TO CONNECT WITH A DETERMINED CHILD

• Try not to let your stubborn personality butt heads with their stubborn personality.

• Instead of struggling to reign them in, try giving a determined child a bit more freedom to discover for herself.

• Cheer them on in their goals.

• Encourage their confidence and passion.

• Instead of questioning, “Do you think that’s a good idea?, try offering, ” I’m excited for you and I’m here to help! but have you ever thought about……….?”

So guys what do you think? Do you recognized any of these traits in your child/children?

Thanks for your time, until next time, stay bless.