I am learning everyday on how to change my approach from treating him like a child to nurturing a supportive, respectful, and collaborative relationship.
This is hard for me at the beginning, but I am now learning everyday that my role is no longer to direct his life but to offer guidance when he asked.
So today I will be sharing my experience with you parenting my son with anyone who is raising a young adult child like me.
Here are some tips on how you can navigate this new relationship:
- Accept Your Evolving Role
- Shift from authority to advisor: Recognize that your role is no longer to direct his life but to offer guidance when asked.
- Respect his independence: Trust him to make his own decisions, even if they differ from what you might choose.
- Celebrate his adulthood: Acknowledge and affirm his growth and maturity as he navigates life.
- Build a Relationship Based on Respect
- Treat him as an equal: Speak to him with the same respect and consideration you would give a friend or colleague.
- Ask for his input: Show that you value his opinions, whether it’s on family matters or broader topics.
- Respect boundaries: Give him space to figure things out on his own without
- Offer Support Without Overstepping
- Be a sounding board: Let him come to you for advice, but avoid offering unsolicited opinions unless it’s a matter of safety or urgency.
- Encourage problem-solving: Ask, “How are you planning to handle this?” instead of immediately stepping in to solve problems.
- Support, don’t rescue: Be there for emotional and moral support, but let him handle the consequences of his choices
4. Communicate Openly
- Prioritize listening: Let him share his thoughts without judgment or interruption.
- Discuss expectations: If he’s living at home, have a conversation about shared responsibilities and boundaries.
- Ask how you can help: Rather than assuming, ask directly what kind of support he’d appreciate.
5. Encourage Independence
- Support life skills: Encourage him to take responsibility for things like budgeting, managing time, and making decisions.
- Respect his timeline: Everyone grows at their own pace—don’t rush him into milestones like moving out or settling on a career.
- Celebrate his wins: Acknowledge his achievements, no matter how small, to boost his confidence.
6. Set Healthy Boundaries
- Balance involvement and space: Stay available but avoid being overly involved in his daily life.
- Discuss mutual expectations: If he’s living at home, agree on boundaries like curfews, contributions to the household, or privacy.
- Take care of yourself: Focus on your own goals and well-being, ensuring your role as a parent doesn’t overshadow your life.
7. Foster Emotional Connection
- Stay curious about his life: Ask about his work, studies, or friendships without prying.
- Show appreciation: Let him know you’re proud of him and love him unconditionally.
- Build shared experiences: Spend time together doing things you both enjoy to strengthen your bond.
8. Let Go of Control
- Trust his judgment: Even if you don’t agree with all his decisions, trust that he’ll learn from his experiences.
- Accept mistakes: Understand that making mistakes is part of growth and avoid saying, “I told you so.”
- Resist the urge to micromanage: Offer guidance only when asked or when necessary.
In Conclusion:
Parenting an adult child is about evolving from a hands-on role to becoming a supportive, trusting partner in their journey. Embrace the shift, and your relationship will grow stronger as you both navigate this new stage.
Happy parenting ❤️❤️
Olu
Positive Parenting With Olu 