Will you please spend some time with me?
I know, I know. She’s always on her phone, or in her room, or with her friends, right?
And when you try to go into her room to talk to her, she acts like you’re intruding and sends you away. Sound familiar?
The reasons why they pretend to be too busy for you is because they know, you coming to their room only meant one thing! To lecture them about stuff or correct them.
Here is what one of the girls I spoke to said “she’s going to bring up grades or homework or the messy room, or worse yet she’s going to lecture and tell a story about a lesson she learned “back in the day.”
Dear moms, Does that sound familiar to you? 👆
👉 So, what does your daughter really want?
✅ She wants time with you without a hidden agenda. Time that isn’t plan or forced.
✅ She wants to laugh with you and be silly.
✅ She wants to tell you about her day without 1000 questions.
✅ She wants to feel accepted by you unconditionally.
The trick to a more connected relationship, though, is that it needs to happen naturally.
The last thing your daughter wants to hear is a guilt trip like, “You never spend any time with me. Let’s do something together!”
It doesn’t have to be a big, scheduled date night or a mother/daughter weekend away, although those are wonderful once in a while. Connecting doesn’t have to be complicated or over-thought.
Little connections can happen all day long—in the car, at bedtime, texts throughout the day, chats while watching TV — until being connected becomes a habit.
Pay special attention to those rare moments when she invites you into her world.
When she tells you a story about some girl drama, just listen. When she tells you about someone she likes, ask to see a picture. When she whines and complains about an assignment or a teacher, just let her vent.
Of course she will make mistakes and of course sometimes she’s just wrong.
But there will be plenty of time for correcting and guiding later.
When she offers you a glimpse into her world, for that brief moment just focus on enjoying the view.
My final thoughts
Dear moms and dad, let’s try to connect with our kids especially our teens more now that they are still with us. My last baby is 18 and in summer he will be moving out and going away from home for a year. He hasn’t left home for more than 2 weeks before and I’m already missing him.
What I’m I trying to say, is that these kids grow up so fast, so instead of focusing on their mistakes let’s focus more on the present moment and enjoy their company, because it doesn’t last forever.
Please leave a comment below 👇 if you agree or not.
Thanks for reading through
Have a blessed day
Positive Parenting With Olu 