WHAT TO DO WHEN THEY MISBEHAVE
❗️Your priority at that moment is to try to know why your child is behaving this way.
❗️Try to help them get through it by listening to them, showing them the love they really need at this challenging time.
I know it’s easier said than done, as parents we need to learn to stay calm in this moment when our children are upset and just try to support them.
By doing this, we will be teaching them and helping them to learn how to have self control which is a great skill.
So please let’s try to always think of the long term.
🚼 Remember children are not born with any skills, we parents are the one responsible to teach them these skills.
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🛑 Talk to them when they are calm.
Find out what triggered their behaviour and listen to them.
Ask them questions like; are you upset because you are not given any choices on this matter or are you frustrated because you feel like no one is listening to you?
Just listen without any judgement or criticism. And allow them that time to express how they are feeling.
👉You will be amazed by what you will discover if you just sit there and listen to them talk (try it)
💠 It’s important they understand that you love them regardless of their behaviour.
💠Let them know that their behavior does not define who they are!
💠Tell them always that you will not stop loving them no matter what!
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🛑 The next tip, is to let your child know the behavior that’s acceptable and what’s not acceptable.
Too often we just assume that our children know what’s expected of them. And what they should or shouldn’t be doing.
No they don’t know what to do unless you tell them!
So using a clear message and telling them what you would like them to be doing rather than focusing on what they shouldn’t be doing.
Most children will usually follow rules or instructions If they know what’s expected of them. (Why do you think kids behave differently when they are at school?)
Setting boundaries and structure
👉Letting children know what is expected of them will help them in the long run.
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🛑 The last tip is that punishing your children when they misbehave is not the answer?
(hmmm, I know what you’re thinking, please keep reading and keep an open mind 😃)
Because you are reinforcing negative behaviour.
You’re judging them and making them feel small, reinforcing their fear, guilt and shame.
This will make them feel like they’re not worthy
Using corporal punishment to correct a child’s misbehaviour might work temporarily, but can cause a long term issues,
Such as;
👉He may be a child who resent the punishment and they become more rebellious
👉 He may become withdrawn and start to do things just to please others, which a sure sign of low-self esteem.
It’s so important to give your child the opportunity to express themselves and what they’re feeling, for them to feel heard and acknowledged and loved.
As parents, when we allow our children to express themselves and we are intentional about how we show up for them daily, you will start noticing a huge difference in their behaviour.
When we show compassion and love to our children rather than reaction and punishment as the answer, you will notice the long term positive behaviour changes in your child.
Please guys the long term is so rewarding
All our children really want is to be heard just like us adults.
I’m sure as adults you will always keep in touch with people or friends that make you feel special. Someone that listens to you. I know I will
So let’s try and that person for our kids 😊
I hope today’s tips help you with how to start to change how you respond to your child’s misbehaviour.
Thanks
Olu 🥰❤️❤️❤️
Positive Parenting With Olu 